Let me tell you what is truly lighting me up right now
Embracing confusion as part of the process and doing more of what gets me fired up
Lil pre-send note: just before I pressed send, my heart skipped a few beats. I imagine that as a beautiful concoction of fear and excitement, feaxcitement. A true sign that I need to do this.
I’ve decided that 2024 will be the year of experimentation. What I mean by that is I want to deepen the experimentations with our body graphs and breathwork. I see them so clearly working together. And the possibilities within that collaboration…ooof, that is the thing that gets me fired up!
This is a vision I’ve been holding since breathwork found me. It is time to honour the vision. It is time to honour the wildest dream. It is time to embrace the path.
What I really want to do is combine breathwork and Human Design.
What I really want to do is use astrology as a navigation tool.
What I really want is for us all to cultivate self-trust through our innate authority.
In my true Gemini way, I want to take these separate modalities and synthesize them in a way that allows us all to embrace this life and love our body as this beautiful temple through which we can experience all of life, through which we allow ourselves to experience all of life and what we truly want.
What I really want is for us all to show up as our beautiful, unapologetic, magical selves so that we can offer our medicine to the world.
Because let me tell you - the world needs more people in their true power. The world needs your medicine. The world needs your gifts. The world needs you to be attuned to your intuition, your deep-rooted self-trust, your deep-rooted desires. The world needs all of you.
Honestly, this is exactly what 2023 has been about - an experimental and explorative journey with my breath and body graph. It all started with rewilding my Root Center and truly surrendering to time, or as one of my Yin yoga teachers phrases it, “yielding to time.”
I see that as our Saturn work.
I am currently in my 5th House Capricorn perfection year, Capricorn being in affinity with Saturn, Kronos, the Father of Time. I feel this deep desire to want to structure things in a way that serves my Sacral. And actually, through that, I am finding out, that is exactly how I serve you. So part of that process has been getting honest with myself and asking myself where I’ve been forcing things, where I’ve been diminishing my own needs, wants, and desires, and where I’ve been playing small.
In a recent reading with the gorgeous
she posed a question to me that I’ve been subconsciously pondering on since. She asked me:how am I dimishing my true nature and power?
A few ways that come to mind: being easily palatable, people-pleasing, relying on external validation for self-worth, shying away from taking up space, shying away from talking about what lights me up, offering what I think others would want, offering things because that is what you do, offering things out of fear of becoming redundant or irrelevant, forcing things out of fear of missing out, forcing things out of fear of falling behind.
A big part of that has been the fear of letting people down.
It has been the fear of not pleasing everyone.
It has been the fear of seeming selfish and self-centered.
So really I have been rewilding my beautiful Generator self and cultivating my capacity in permitting myself to disappoint people, lose people, be disapproved of, unfollowed, rejected, and ridiculed. Something tells me I am only at the beginning of that journey. And it feels liberating.
Knowing that I can permit myself for all of that to be present, is so freaking liberating.
There is so much power in claiming what I want to exert my energy on.
All this people-pleasing and seeking external validation is exhausting. Constantly worrying about what others might think or how I may be perceived, or even comparing myself to how others do things is so paralyzing and it is something I no longer want to give any of my energy to.
I want to show up in my power.
I want to show up fired up.
I want to show up as truthful as I am at any given moment.
I want that to all of us. That’s the collective part of me, and I have a lot of that according to my body graph.
I feel like I am finally coming to terms with being very individually and collectively minded. I am not tribal at all. That’s not my way of being in this world this time around. I am meant to be very self-explorative and self-experimental and through that process to reach the collective. And that is something I have shied away from because of all my wounding around being visible. But there is this beautiful saying around the idea of discomfort becoming too much. When we hit that place within ourselves, there is only one way through, and that is taking action.
It is taking action despite the uncomfortableness.
It is taking action despite the fears.
It is taking action despite all the preconceived opinions or judgments.
What is it that you want?
What is your wildest dream?
How have you been diminishing your true nature and power?
This is exactly what I want to hold space for. I want to hold space for your wildest dreams and ALL THE THINGS that stop you from going for it.
UPDATE: All the spots have now been filled. January will be an experimentation month. THANK YOU to those who will help me play and explore this idea. Can’t wait!
So, with all that said, I am opening up an apprenticeship for myself. I want to experiment and explore with you. I want to chat with you about your Human Design. I want to look at your transits and the cosmic correlation to it all. And then I want to guide you through a breathwork journey where you get to explore and integrate all that came up through our body graph and chart chat. I want you to take something tangible and practical with you that you can start to implement right away.
And since this is very experimental, I want to honour this by offering five magical beings the chance to come and explore and experiment with me. I imagine these five sessions as free of charge. I want to take the pressure off myself, firstly, and you, secondly. All I would ask is feedback and perhaps a testimonial.
So, what do you say? Are you in for some fun?
Sending you a deep breath,
Silvia
Absolutely all of this. I share it all of the time but it reminds me again of my favorite quote from Martha Graham:
“There is a vitality, a life force, a quickening that is translated through you into action, and there is only one of you in all time, this expression is unique, and if you block it, it will never exist through any other medium; and be lost. The world will not have it. It is not your business to determine how good it is, not how it compares with other expression. It is your business to keep it yours clearly and directly, to keep the channel open. You do not even have to believe in yourself or your work. You have to keep open and aware directly to the urges that motivate you. Keep the channel open."
“How have you been diminishing your true nature and power?” Love, love, love this enquiry. I’m going to think on this over the weekend ☺️